Summer of Andrea

Seinfeld, even after years releasing episodes, remains to be a staple in my television “diet”.  George Costanza has also inspired me to pick a theme for each upcoming summer. Summer of George, summer of work, summer of plants, etc. This summer is no different. 

For the first time in, wow– I think 7 years, I am completely free of a significant other. Doin’ “me” whenever, wherever. And, for probably the first time in my life, I’m excited to see where my life takes ME and what I can do for MYSELF this summer. Selfish? Barely, but well deserved. For years I’ve been pretending to “find myself” but instead have been trying to shape myself into a mold that didn’t quite fit. 

These molds aren’t necessarily the boys I’ve fallen smitten to, but the atmosphere I’ve surround myself with. That’s not to say I wasn’t myself though–just that I wasn’t fully happy being me. I’ve always found my jokes to be funnier than most, that hasn’t changed a bit. But sometimes after leaving a friend’s house, I wouldn’t be happy being by myself. Feeling down, thinking of ways to be more like “friend A” because they were super awesome. 

But guess what?

I’m freakin’ awesome. And not just the oh you’re athletic/ awesome “persona”.  I am a spit fire. I’m brutally honest. I speak before thinking over half the time and I curse like redneck hillbilly. I can confidently say I work harder than most people.  I’m witty and you’d be amazed by the small details I can remember after meeting a person only once. 

I could talk about myself further, but that’s just the only child in me. 

But to continue this “selfishness”, this summer is going to be The Summer of Andrea.  I don’t want to be 29 and living in hindsight, wishing I had done this and gone there. I already regret investing my time in an asshole that wasn’t worth a third of it, and the  years spent not loving myself.  I am going to Dublin, Ireland for a month- because I want to go. I’m visiting my fellow badass bitch Beccs in Portland because the dream of the 90s is alive there. I have a great group of friends that I love to death, and love me for all my weirdness. I’ll be working in the greenhouse again because I thoroughly enjoy it. And most importantly, I’m going to love the hell out of myself. 

30 days and 30 nights

1 month of no gluten. 3 cheats. A test of willpower and an attempt to not feel fat and bloated for 5 seconds of my life. 

I kept a note going in my phone of my GF thoughts throughout the month.  Are they dramatic? Yeah, but how else is a foodie supposed to react to this sort of thing? 

day 1: walking past the bakery was rough at the grocery store but GF chex cereal is amazing so maybe life will continue. 

Day 2: almost ate a spare noodle on the strainer-close call. 

Day 3: people need to stop saying “pancake” OR DIE!!! 

I’m officially that annoying bitch eating rice cakes in class. To the girl next to me, I saw those judgmental eyes… Do it again I dare ya. 

Day 4: starting to wonder if gluten free life is compromising my training (running). Or maybe it’s the added 27 miles last week….

Day 5: I caved.  Well, not officially but I went to see Paul (magic hands) for a massage and he bought me lunch.  Of course I wasn’t turning it down.  Feeling poopy now, but maybe that’s just the “guilt.”  

Day 6: going to panera is really depressing knowing there isn’t a baguette to enjoy. 

Also quinoa and cheese to replace Mac and cheese tastes as good as it sounds. 

Day 7: thank goodness for chex cereal. 

Day 8: had to pick packing rice cakes over sunscreen #priorities 

Accidentally ate wheat but not counting it as a cheat bc why the fuck is there wheat in the peanuts Southwest? And it was only 5 or so peanuts anyways. 

Side note- whoever farted on the plane is a dark soul. 

Day 9: to the waitress that was so concerned with my gluten limitations, next time don’t make sure the chef uses a wheat tortilla for my fajitas….. Come on. 

Day 10: back to the grind of quinoa and rice cakes. 

Day 11: how can one enjoy Ben & Jerry’s if  the good flavors involve cookie or brownie bits? 

Day 12: pizza is so amazing. 

Day 13: God damnit pizza, you really did me wrong.

Day 14: If Nicole puts her donut up to my face again, I will stab her. 

Day 15: tried the GF pancakes. Not the best, but I’ll eat em.

Day 16: no complaints bc Chex cereal is stocked. 

Day 17: searched “how to make rice cakes” on Pinterest and we’re just gonna say that’s in the top 5 low points of my life. 

Also super disappointed that Cliff bars aren’t gluten free per say. But how harmful is contamination really? 

Day 18: had my first taste at GF bread. It wasn’t half bad actually. 

Day 19: is this even working? 

I miss toast.

Day 20: pretty agitated that rice cakes are bloatin’ me up. 

Day 21: turning down the roll that comes with a salad is morally corrupt. 

Day 22: I just want a burger on a fucking bun. And some pretzels. SOMETHING. 

It baffles me that even with the amount of attention this lifestyle has gotten, that grocery stores don’t do a better job at providing options and advertising correct options. I was in Giant Eagle, saw some Kashi bars that the store has labeled as gluten free, so I bought some. They in fact DO contain wheat, as one of the first ingredients. !!!!! I should have looked before the purchase was made, but get it together Giant Eagle. Isn’t that how petty lawsuits come about? 

(Discovery of the wheat was made mid bite, so yeah…. Cheat #4?)

Day 23: over it. Just really, really over it. 

Day 24: I realize that I am incredibly dramatic, but being a runner and dealing with this has been really tough. The meal before a workout is crucial and when you can’t rely on your “go-to” because it’s FILLED with gluten, well that’s a buzz kill. All props to those that have celiac-you guys are the real troopers. Humans are animals of habit, which is also why breaking habits seem nearly impossible. This whole 30 day thing is more than justin attempt to feel good about myself again, but proof that if I stick to something for 30 days, I can do anything if the effort is applied. 

Okay sappy thought over. 

Day 25:  I figured the “May contain traces of wheat…” warning on the Cliff Bar packaging was okay enough to eat.  Protein poop bar.  Karma. 

Day 26: freshies treatin’ me to campus food aka GF pasta aka could be better….

Day 27: no issues with gluten but what the hell is beef brisket? Never again. 

Day 28: nailed the GF pancakes this morning– fluffy and glorious.

Day 29: the grocery store had freshly baked bread this morning and the aromas brought tears to my eyes.

Day 30: it is a glorious day because it is the last day. Going out on rice cakes and potatoes, but with the dream of tomorrow’s bread feast. 

It pains me to report that in the grand scheme of things, I did feel better without the gluten.  Now it’s just a matter of finding the GF foods I enjoy instead of chomping on rice cakes, seasoned with my tears (not really people).  I will still eat pizza whenever it’s offered though–totally worth it.